bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
