I CAN MOONWALK!
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize