The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
