omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
