Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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