that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
