My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
