Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize
