Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Someone stole a lamp last night.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Randomize