I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
God gave him joint rollers for hands
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize