Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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