Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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