If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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