the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
