Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
