Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
