did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Randomize