...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
