Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
