we have pet lesbian snakes
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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