was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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