You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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