I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
