I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
