The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
