The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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