I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
