i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Randomize