:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
