Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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