Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
