Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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