i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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