that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
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