That's intense
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Randomize
