dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
