his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Randomize
