Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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