Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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