Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Randomize
