then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Randomize