lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
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