Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize