im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
