It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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