Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
