He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize