Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
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