I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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