Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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