I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize