Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Bring me that man meat
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
