ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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